Forreal, it's one of those movies that is literally terrible. Not even in a "so-bad-it's-good" kinda way. Nope, it's pure, unadulterated shit. It's main redeeming feature is that it's only 40-odd minutes long. The downside? It's 40-odd minutes of your life you will never get back.
The company that produced it also produced Netflix's Disney rip-offs and although it's supposedly a Ratatouille-esque film it's just freaking awful. However the producers have (I think) also acknowledged it's their worst film (with an even worse name). So there's that.
So on to the craptastrophe!
It's set in Rio di Janeiro, which is a shame because that place looks absolutely stunning. The narrator starts out with some babbling tale about "this sophisticated restaurant" mentioning the fact that we're in a city at least times. Y'all need to see this absolutely beautiful and amazing 3D animation.
Y'all ready?
You sure?
Here we go....
Are y'all impressed?!?!?! Cause you totally should be. I don't think you can handle this but I digress!!
They're currently complimenting how great the chef and their food is even though they haven't tasted it yet. Perhaps they're psychic? It's at this point (literally not even 3 minutes in) I really want to stop watching. It's like PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY.
I also don't think these people have ever been in a restaurant, because no freaking way people talk like this: "Okay I'll put this order in the kitchen" really? I thought you were gonna put this order on the moon or something you freaking dumbass.
Now these mice are discussing gorgonzola cheese or something and it's ridiculous, just like the walking animations of Carol the waitmouse.
I'm basically screaming at my computer SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP because it's so ridiculous and I'm not quite sure what or why is happening.
These scenes don't add anything to anything so I don't see the point. Does this movie have a plot? Does this scene mean anything? Is this an allegory towards life? WHY ARE THEY COMMENTING ABOUT FOOD? These are the questions we won't know because we don't care.
"Our ice cream is always served fresh" BECAUSE IF IT'S NOT IT'S JUST MELTED VANILLA CREAM WHAT THE HECKAROO IS THE POINT OF ALL THIS?!
This guy is pestering waitmouse about the recipes. This whole scene reminds me of Spongebob...
It also reminds me I'd rather be watching Spongebob because at least there's a slight plot there. Anyway bitches are getting aggro and this mouse has like a paper moustache on and it's like girl ain't nobody taking you serious.
Old man Mouse is just annoying as hell and needs to shut his mouth because nothing that makes sense is coming out of there. "Young man your parents should be so proud this food is totez amazeballs" (paraphrased ofc) but WHO SPEAKS LIKE THAT?! Why don't you just say "DANG BOY YOU KNOW HOW TO COOOOOK YA NA MEAN?!" but no thank the parents because you know, genes and shit.
If Sassy Gay Friend were watching do you know what he would say?
I feel u gurl, I feel u.
10 minutes in and I'm struggling to stay watching. It's PAINFUL to watch, my eyes are just falling asleep ugh. BUT I SHALL POWER THROUGH FOR WHOEVER READS MY BLOG.
I swear to God this man has said THIS RESTAURANT IS GR9 and THIS FOOD IS DELISH and I am losing the will to live.
Secret ingredient is...... DEDICATION AND CARE. Yeah if y'all wanna make the world's best cookies you don't need the chocolate chips or flour you need dedication and care.
After this cooking masterclass Marcel or whatever he's called is interrupted by loud green mouse and has been rescued because he hates talking to his clients. WHY DO YOU WORK IN THE SERVICE INDUSTRY IF YOU HATE OTHER PEOPLE MARCELL, WHY?!
SHOCK HORROR people who were trying to get the secret ingredients and stuff own a RIVAL!RESTAURANT!
"Let's get rid of Marcel" PLEAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE GET RID OF THEM, KILL THEM, KILL THEM ALL. DO US ALL A FAVOUR.
CUT to the world's worst suiting up scene I have ever had the mispleasure of seeing. One of them just pulled Cheese out of somewhere and I do not wanna know where it came from because mice do not have pockets.
This random ass scene that in no way helps the plot or even contribute to what the hell the plot is went on for far too long, like at least 2 minutes. The dumbass RIVAL! spend every day eating at Ratatoing because THAT MAKES SENSE RIGHT?! Idiot mouse left her notebook there. All the notebook contains is ONE piece of paper that says "Marcel's secret ingredient" and his signature. Top class note taker here.
BIGGEST PLOT TWIST: FAKE MOUSTACHE MOUSE HAS AN ACTUAL FAKE MOUSTACHE.
AND THEY STEAL ALL THEIR FOOD FROM HUMAN RESTAURANTS? He's grapple hooked himself to the ceiling fan and I hope he dies because there's still 20 minutes to go.
Rival mouse betch has discovered the secret kitchen tile and SOMEHOW green mouse is flying around the kitchen and OMG THEY ARE SO STUPID IT LITERALLY PAINS ME TO TYPE THIS.
Subtlety is not Rival mouse's strong point because she's literally standing in the big old square space BUT SHE FIGURED OUT THE SECRET OH NOOOOOO
STRAWBERRIES DO NOT LAST A WEEK MARCEL STOP BEING A GRUBBY, DISGUSTING LIL SHIT.
Waitmouse is talking to himself in the doorway and I'm dying of LAME. Panic! at the disco would not be impressed that the thing he has forgotten is to LOCK THE DOOR, the last thing you'd do of a night walking in a restaurant.
I still have 22 minutes to go and I don't know if I can do it. I like the barbie movies because they're hilariously bad this is just a trainwreck.
They've all decided they can't compete with Marcel because he has fresh ingredients and they have crap ingredients and I wish it would end here but alas there's still 20 minutes to go.
Their new plan is to basically close the human restaurant by doing some weird dance routine which I do not understand the point of because they're really stupid. so basically these assholes are closing down a restaurant so their shitty mouse restaurant can be good. Y'all are assholes. YES.
Ratatoing mice basically then bitch about how GreenMouseGreg is a clumsy lil shit who ruined everything.
OH MY GOD ANOTHER SUIT UP SCENE WHY
CAROL DOESN'T TRUST HER MICE INSTINCTS ABOUT THE MOUSE TRAPS BECAUSE MARCEL HAS NEVER SEEN ONE BEFORE? (Hint: He's an idiot)
We are then TREATED to an extra long walk scene of him going yupp there's a trap and yepp there's a trap over there too.
Just call him Marcel "Mousey" McSwag yo
GOOD NEWS IS THERE IS 10 MINUTES TO GO.
Marcel meanwhile has swagged his way up to a bar of chocolate because these human chefs are rubbish at their jobs leaving chocolate all over the dang place. AT LEAST HE'S LIFTING BRO. There's a creeps cat prowling which is my fave bit so far.
Yeah the red says it all really!
This cat can't handle Mousey McSwag so fails to get it all the time until McSwag hits it in the face with chocolate dang.
They could go to a different restaurant BUT they're too stupid to figure that out.
RIVAL RATATOING have succeeded in making McSwag's empty but their restaurant is also shit so basically this was all pointless.
McSwag is going back! CAN'T KEEP MCSWAG DOWN Y'ALL, SUITED UP AND BOOTED UP MCSWAG IS READY FOR MISSION IMMOUSEIBLE 2
McSWAG GONNA GET THE CAT BACK AND HE'S GONNA STEAL DA CHEDDAR. This cat thaaaang is a creepy lil shit I don't know what kind of breed it is.
He literally shouts "GET THE FOOD I'LL DISTRACT THE CAT" right in front of the cat which is dumb as hell. I don't think this cat gives a crap about you tbh McSwag just give up babes.
The cat running is like a baby when it's just learnt to walk and it tries to run and it has flailing arms all over the place you know? I'm so done with this movie and oh my gosh it's like it's never ending.
CAT GETS THE BAD RATS BECAUSE HE'S BFFS WITH MCSWAG. PAULO AND MCSWAG BEST FRIENDS FOR LYF. Paulo has begun to eat at the mouse restaurant and has salmon with cheese because he's a cat in a mouse restaurant lolsofunny
AND FINALLY IT'S OVER. 40 LONG MINUTES AND IT'S FINALLY OVER. MY MISERY HAS ENDED AND SO HAS YOURS.
So yeah don't watch ratatoing unless you hate yourself.
Out of 10 I'd give it a negative 12, it's so bad, it's not funny and the mice are annoying as hell.
i really truly enjoyed this movie, you should be ashamed of yourself for giving false information
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